“Look out how you use proud words.
When you let proud words go, it is not easy to call them back.
They wear long boots, hard boots; they walk off proud; they can’t hear you calling—
Look out how you use proud words.”—Carl Sandburg
“Let a joy keep you.
Reach out your hands
And take it when it runs by,
As the Apache dancer
Clutches his woman.
I have seen them
Live long and laugh loud,
Sent on singing, singing,
Smashed to the heart
Under the ribs
With a terrible love.
Let joy kill you!
Keep away from the little deaths.”—Carl Sanburg
Lay me on an anvil, O God.
Beat me and hammer me into a crowbar.
Let me pry loose old walls.
Let me lift and loosen old foundations.
Lay me on an anvil, O God.
Beat me and hammer me into a steel spike.
Drive me into the girders that hold a skyscraper together.
Take red-hot rivets and fasten me into the central girders.
Let me be the great nail holding a skyscraper through blue nights into white stars.
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO KINDLY ASK YOU TO “REPLY ALL” ON THIS EMAIL THREAD?
Answer: all the times. every. single. time.
WHEN ARE YOU ACTUALLY GOING TO READ THE EMAIL I SENT IN IT’S THREE SENTENCE ENTIRETY AND FOLLOW IT’S INSTRUCTIONS? AND ACTUALLY HIT “REPLY ALL” OR INCLUDE firstname.lastname@example.org* ON ALL EMAILS, AS REQUESTED?
Answer: Never. Never, ever, ever. I will spend all afternoon forwarding emails full of incomplete sentences and none of the information we are looking for to the rest of my department and crying.
I’m excited to announce that Glenn Howerton (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia), Steve Little (Eastbound and Down), Josh Groban (The Office and “Music”) and I will star in CollegeHumor’s first feature length film- “Coffeetown.” The movie is being written and directed by the talented
So this is two stories in one, Delta Spirit have announced that they will be making their way back to Los Angeles for another show. Where will they be playing? The Music Box. That’s right, the Hollywood venue that has so many rumors flying around right now about it’s current operating…
I could say it was infinitely better than 2009 and 2010.
I could say it was a year bookended by deaths and funerals.
I could say I went on dozens of job interviews, got one new job, and moved 4 times this year.
I could be metaphorical and show you a picture of my office plant. It was a gift at a funeral of a family member and has sat on my desk since I started this job in January. It has grown by about 200%, yet all the original leaves have fallen off and only the new growth remains.
I could simply post a picture of my boyfriend Jim and tell you that 2011 was the year I met the man I plan on spending the rest of my life with.
There are a lot of things to say about this transitional, wonderful, challenging year in my life.
But then, I read this post by Anais in which she says:
I am building a life for myself, finding people who are a part of my chosen family, and allowing myself to let go of the pain that life causes for, I don’t know, a chance at something really good
And I realized: 2011 is the year I finally started building a life for myself.
In 2011, I finally made it to a place where I can take care of my own physical, financial, mental, and emotional needs. I have chronic clinical depression and suffered a traumatic head injury my freshman year of college. Meeting these needs independently may be something you take for granted. But for me, it feels as though I finally have what I have wanted for so long: a life of my own.
And as it seems to go, once I achieved that dream and got to a place where I could confidently provide for all of my own needs: in walked love. For me, as a person who externalizes everything, having a true partner and experiencing love is something I have always yearned for. To have it come into my life just as I was commencing a new, more self-reliant chapter has actually been quite serendipitous, as counter-intuitive as that seems. I feel free to grow and explore because I know I am not just accepted, but embraced, loved, and cherished for everything that makes me “me.” There is no choice, no adventure, no challenge that my brain could possibly conceive of that Jim would not support, much less adore.
And on a more obvious note, having someone I love so dearly has stretched me in ways I had not expected. I have found parts and pieces of me, both dark and wonderful, I had not known existed. If that’s not “coming into yourself,” well, I don’t know what is.
In 2011 I started building a life for myself and it has been through that process and the process of building a life with Jim that I have discovered something really good.
November 16, 1922 - My grandfather is born in Marlow, Oklahoma. He will later move to Porterville, CA during the Dust Bowl and become an “Okie.”
December 7, 1941 - Pearl Harbor is bombed, prompting the U.S. to become involved in World War II.
January 25, 1943 - My grandfather is inducted into the Army. He will leave behind his new bride when he ships out to Europe. His nickname in the Army is “Good Kid.”
December 8, 1945 - My grandfather is honorably discharged from the Army and returns home to Porterville, CA.
Sometime before 1950 - My grandfather, his wife, and their firstborn move to Bakersfield, CA where my grandfather has taken a job as a baker.
1950 - My father is born. He is the second of what will be a total of four children - all boys.
The 1960s - The Vietnam conflict escalates and the draft is enacted.
The early 1970s - My grandmother falls ill with Hodgkin’s Disease. A friend of my father’s at the draft board tells him his number is about to come up, so my father enlists in the Army. He serves in Korea, avoiding Vietnam, but still sustains an injury - he is shot in the shoulder as a result of “friendly fire.” While my father is in the Army, my grandmother passes away. My grandfather remarries. My father returns home.
January 1975 - My father marries my mother.
1981 - My brother is born
1984 - I enter the world, two weeks ahead of my due date. It is the first and last time I am ever early for anything, ever.
1990 - My family moves to Clovis, CA
The mid 1990s - My grandfather sells the bakery he has worked at and owned for over thirty years. My birthday cakes will never be the same.
2002 - My grandfather’s second wife passes away
December 2, 2011 - My grandfather is diagnosed with congestive heart failure. He declines to take further tests and pursue treatment. In the last 10-15 years he has already survived multiple strokes and has had at least two surgeries to clean out his arteries.
December 3, 2011 - My grandfather passes away in the morning hours. It is suspected he had a heart attack at the age of 89. My holidays will never be the same. There will no longer be fresh baked dinner rolls with dinner and homemade cinnamon rolls to heat up for breakfast. There is one less Garvin to crack jokes and use the terrible and wonderful puns that the Garvin men are so fond of using. He was generous and kind to all, funny as can be, and is already missed.
December 10, 2011 - The Honor Guard will come and fold a flag, place it on my grandfather’s coffin, and we will lower his body into the ground.