My Neuroses For Your Entertainment

This is what my family will most likely make/serve/eat for Thanksgiving

• Turkey
• Ham
• Prime Rib (mostly for my Grandpa. I’m not sure if he eats any other meats. Pretty sure it’s just prime rib)
• stuffing
• mashed potatoes and gravy
• cranberry sauce (for my mom, and probably only my mom)
• yams with mini marshmallows
• sweet potato pie (a specialty of my sister-in-law’s)
• green bean casserole
• pineapple casserole
• a jello mold
• homemade rolls (thank you, Grandpa, the retired baker)
• waldorf salad
• a grape, marshmallow, fruit salad whose name eludes me
• various pies
• birthday cake

We are not having it at my aunt’s house this year, which means we will miss out on her homemade Italian Spaghetti Bolognese. Major bummer.

4 of those dishes will most likely include mini marshmallows.

Yes, there will be three kinds of meat.

My brother was born on Thanksgiving. This explains the birthday cake. His birthday falls on the holiday again this year. Even if it didn’t, his birthday would be right around the corner, and there would be family around…which sounds like cake time to meeeeeeeee. And if I know my mother, and I think I do, there will also be party hats.

And of course, there will be a veggie platter. Because it’s not a holiday until I put black olives on all of my fingers and pretend they are members of the royal guard who get into a squabble and meet their doom (in my mouth)!

The inevitable procrastination by the Garvin women (like mother, like daughter) means that last minute frustration and slight panic will also be served. These are dishes best served hot.

The best part is that there is going to be a delicious baby at the table and I am going to just eat him all up.